Feel like I can do anything! I absolutely love the feeling I get after a run.
Now, right now I can't even run a whole mile at a time. I am still doing intervals at this point. Since I rested my knee it has been doing SO much better. It doesn't hurt at all anymore. So I thought I would give it a try today. I popped in a DVD I hadn't seen before and warmed up for a about .25 of a mile. Then I covered the display on the treadmill with a towel and I ran. It's actually the only way I can run on the treadmill. Being able to see the time tick by drives me nuts and makes the time move slower. Having the movie on definitely helped me in being able to run for longer periods of time as I was distracted. I did 2 miles in 31 minutes. I know it's not where I was last year, but you know what??? It's better than I was doing two months ago! And I feel great! I am definitely making progress. I love love love how I feel when I run. A great workout always makes me feel better about myself. Not only do I feel great just because I ran, but I begin to remember all the reasons to love myself as I am right now.
Sometimes I get so hung up on who/what I want to be that I forget that I am still going to be the same me. I have a hard time receiving a compliment right now because I honestly don't believe them (when they are talking about my physical appearance). I get caught up on the fact that I am not where I want to be yet. But I need to remember that I am not going to get where I want to be without accepting where I am right now. I am slowly learning to love myself where I am at right now. This is really tough for me. I decided a month or so ago that whenever my husband complimented me that I needed to just say thank you. Instead of my usual eye roll, whatever you say attitude that I had before. It's taking time to adjust, but it makes a big difference for me. I need to believe him that he thinks I am beautiful. I do believe him. I just don't think it about myself yet.
I'm on week seven of C25K, and amazed that I can actually run. I never thought I could. Truth is, I just never made myself, because it is hard! But it is also wonderful. That feeling after a run, amazing! I think you are definitely being too hard on yourself. You have a new baby, for pete's sake! You are awesome! Where you are right now IS wonderful!
ReplyDeleteThank you! I knokw I can be too hard on myself. In fact, I remember telling another brand new mom the same exact thing last year when she was beating herself up for not losing all the baby weigh within 6 weeks. I think for me the hardest part is the fact that I gained SO much with this pregnancy and having to accept myself at my heaviest weight right now. Running is definitely hard, but once I get past the initial getting started I always feel amazing. It's a feeling I must remember the next time I try to think up excuses to not run!
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